Distance
April 2024
acrylic paint and ink on illustration board, wire
Feelings of social anxiety pervaded my experiences in childhood and adolescence. My desire to belong and be part of a group was confronted with the fear of being unwelcome or an outcast. These fears drove a competing desire to disappear, which often became the more powerful one. Social anxiety left me questioning if I was doing the right things to “fit in,” and frequently unable to initiate conversation. I often wondered if people were genuinely being nice to me or talking behind my back. I still do. But, as I make efforts to continue growing, I’m facing the uncomfortable and pushing conversations I’ve historically tried to avoid.
Using paint, ink, and wire, I focus on the degree of separation I often felt from my peers and illustrate the complex and competing desires that I was often unable to put into words. My work is a way to process my past, to move forward, and to show myself just how much I’ve grown, as well as a space for viewers to find validation for similar experiences and struggles of their own. Now, I am giving voice to those challenges I dealt with for so long that I never had the strength to confront through a series of narrative images.
